


Unaccepted

by Miss_Kitten



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: A lot of angst tbh, Angst, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Smut, F/M, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-12
Updated: 2016-04-17
Packaged: 2018-05-19 23:08:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5983726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Kitten/pseuds/Miss_Kitten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reader, the princess of Numenor, is forced to marry Sauron, her father's most trusted advisor. Needless to say, she's not very fond of that idea. </p><p>Based on an imagine (Imagine being forced into a marriage with Sauron) found at imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Leaning cautiously, you were looking at the soldiers, marching towards castle’s front gates. On the front of them walked your father, Ar-Pharazôn, The King of Númenor, surrounded by his most trusted advisors and warriors. His chest was proudly puffed out, his head held high and you knew the victory was achieved.

Your father made a decision to march on Mordor in order to rival its Lord on lordship of the Earth. He feared that, with systematically boosting power and followers among Men, Sauron would become a threat to his throne.

And you knew your father would not bear losing his precious leadership over Númenóreans, least of it to this awful creature.

Now, as you noticed, Sauron was lead after Ar- Pharazôn, chain running over his wrists and between his tied palms, its end held securely by your father. Being as curious as always, you eyes the ‘horrid monster’ as your mother called The Lord of Mordor, and you had to admit – you had never seen fairest man in your life.

He was tall, keeping his back straight, towering over all soldiers, your father included. His long loosen hair were gleaming in the sunlight, its blond strands floating upon his black armor, as if it was moving by itself. His skin seemed to be as soft as one of newborn child, creamy white, yet flushed on his cheeks. His armor was all black, you did not see other colors, full of pointy spikes.

But the thing that both, fascinated and scared you the most was his eyes. Ardently orange they were, burning with their own inner fire as he leisurely watched the city around. You opened your mouth a bit, being in awe as you shamelessly stared at Sauron, scanning his figure, his every feature and, out of sudden, his eyes met yours and a shiver run down your spine as you pushed yourself from the window, panting heavily.

It was as if he could look into your very soul.

________

You were beyond happy to learn that Sauron would be held captive in the dungeons. You did not want to imagine what he might do while freely walking castle’s halls.

Often, you were wondering how such an astonishing being became so evil. Your mother told you what Sauron did, yet you could not understand why he let Morgoth corrupt him. What he gained appeared to be useless and irrelevant for you.

Unfortunately, your father was as easily corrupted as Mairon once was.

________

Years had passed, and you were witnessing how Sauron, day by day, month by month, year by year, grew more important. From a hostage at first, to master of King’s councils later, and, eventually, your father’s most trusted advisor, Sauron gained power in Númenor, whispering flattering words to your father’s ears, which he readily believed in.

Many times you encountered Sauron during your daily walks through castle’s corridors. Every time he would bow his head and greet you with soft “My lady” drifting from his perfectly shaped pink lips, smirking at you devilishly. And every time, after you would return greetings and walk past him, you could feel his burning gaze on your back.

He was making you afraid, there were no denying it. you wasn’t as blind as your father was – you saw an evil sparkle in Sauron’s orange eyes as he spoke with Ar- Pharazôn. You feared of your safety, for such an ally on your father side would not bring any good to you or any of Númenóreans.

_________

“I do not care about you willing to do it or not. It is decided.” Your father’s harsh voice run through his throne hall, violently invading your ears.

Only minutes ago you entered throne hall, being lead by one of the guards with short “Your father calls for you, my lady.”. Sauron was at King’s side, as per usual, but you did not see anyone else.

Your steps were loud in empty vast room and your heart began to race as your father laid his eyes on you. Much to your horror, you noticed a strange, stone-hard determination in them.

As you stood in front of him, greeted him and Sauron with short bow of your head, you moved your eyes to look at dangerous advisor of your father. He was sitting relaxed in his chair, having propped his elbow on an arm and placed his chin on his hand. He looked genuinely interested in what would happen.

“Tomorrow you shall marry Sauron.” Announced your father, no emotion evident in his voice and you jerked your head to see if he was sure of what he said.

There was nothing but authority on his expression and you felt your face turning pale. He could not be serious, he could not do such thing to you – his one and only child.

“Father, I will not do it.” with all will-power you could muster you stated through clenched teeth, balling your hands into fists, but to no avail.

No words could make your father change his mind, even silent disagreement from Sauron.

Decision was made and you were to wed Sauron the next day, no matter what.

_______

You cried all night, finding no comfort in sleep. You had nightmares every time you closed your eyes, seeing yourself in black armor, next to Sauron. You tossed and turned in your bed, until dawn finally started creeping on the horizon, lazily lighting your room.

You pulled bed sheets away and went out, going to the window. You hoped that cold morning air would give you a kind of consolation, but it did not work. The thought of becoming Sauron’s wife lied heavily in your mind, filling you with unspeakable sadness. You did not imagine yourself growing fond of him, you were sure that only feeling you would ever carry toward him was hatred.

You sighed and looked over your shoulder at a dress your mother gave you the evening before. She came to your room after your conversation with Ar-Pharazôn.

“I tried to reason him, Y/N.” she’d said. “I did not want for you a life I had. I did not want you to be forced. But he-“ her voice broke and you saw tears running down her cheeks. “Forgive me, my child. I could not do anything.”

And you were well aware that she had tried her best, she always did. Being forced into marrying The King, she promised you that you would be able to chose whoever you would want. Your father, however, did not care about such silly things.

His will had to be done and now, as you went out of bathroom and proceeded to wear your wedding dress on, you could not help but wonder what would happen if you simply didn’t come. Or jump out of your window. Or run away.

For your father it would mean nothing.

You smoothed the skirts, looking at yourself in a mirror. The dress was undeniably breathtaking, looking as you were dress in a wind, floating gently around your ankles. You brushed your hair, deciding to leave it unbraided. You put no jewelry on.

Taking a deep breath, you stepped out of your room, knowing that it was the last time you had ever seen it.

______

Under any other circumstances, you would be amazed by how nicely the throne hall was decorated. Fresh flowers were gathered and adorned all over the room. Young children were holding little white bouquets, standing in two lines between and alley, which led straight to the throne where your father stood. On his left there was your mother with her head hung low and an already wet handkerchief in her grip. On his right you saw Sauron, dressed in his shiny black armor, his back erected. He was looking at you with unhidden awe in his eyes, admiring your pure beauty.

With racing heart and shaking hands, you were stepping closer and closer, nearing what was inevitable with every move. All was still, no music was played, no one dared make a sound.

It seemed to be as if one was about to be buried rather than wed.

When you approached your husband-to-be and took his prepare hand, your heart stopped beating for a moment. You expected him to be cold as ice, but his palm was pleasantly warm, almost reassuring.

With emotionless expression you faced your father, waiting for him to start.

_______

“By the power I have been given, I announce you husband and wife!” your father called loudly with pride filling his voice and you heard a round of ovations behind your back.

It was a pure torture to go through whole ceremony without screaming out loud. Hearing your mother’s silent crying didn’t help you, but somehow you managed to keep your composed pose, even during reciting wedding vows and exchanging a kiss with your wedded.

Your only desire was to be left alone. However, you had one more thing to cope with. Leaving your parents and going with Sauron to his fortress.

_______

Your heart was being broken over and over again and you were wondering how much more would you be able to bear.

After the ceremony, Sauron gratefully gave you some time alone to say goodbye to your mother. She was mostly apologizing you for being unable to stop her husband and you were mostly assuring her that it was only your father’s fault.

You never felt more hopeless. There was nobody in entire Arda, who could save from the fate you had been thrown into, and, at that moment, you had no strength to fight against it. You doubted if it was even possible.

You held your mother for the last time and, wiping the tears from your cheeks, you approached your husband, looking expectedly at him.

“Take my hand” he said, his voice rich and soft, as he presented you his opened palm.

“But how..?”

“Do not worry, just take my hand and close your eyes.”

And as he asked, you did, seconds later opening your eyes in unknown corridor, lighted by few torches.

“Welcome in Barad-dûr, Y/N.”

_______

Through dark corridors, Sauron led you deeper and deeper into fortress. You were shivering, not because of the cold, but of fear. You were now on his territory, without your people to help you if needed.

And, after all, it was your wedding night, and your ‘no’ would not possibly stop him from claiming you as his.

Few more steps later, Sauron stopped before high black carved door and pushed them open, stepping aside, so you could enter the room first.

Cautiously, you stepped in and it was a surprise. It was unexpectedly light, with big windows on one wall, a fireplace on the opposite one, with fire crackling merrily in it. There was a vast bed, placed in the middle on the wall in front of you, with white bed sheets on it, and, as you walked around the room, you could not deny that it was at least nice, nicer than you expected.

Sauron, with a small smile on his face, started to approach you and, noticing him, you quickly stepped back, terror filling your every cell.

“My lord, I-“ you whispered weakly, your voice trembling, your face turning pale. You did not want to let him touch you, not ever.

“Y/N, I shall not force you to anything.” He stated calmly, halting few inches away from you. “I do realize you are here against your will and I shall do nothing more to torment you further. It is not my intention to hurt you, do believe me.” Something in his voice and the way his eyes searched for yours made you believe him and you nodded to assure him you understood.

“I shall lay with you, only if you welcome me here. And, please, call me by my name.” you nodded again, taking a breath, already feeling calmer.

“Goodnight, Y/N.” Sauron said and went to the door, opening them and looking at you over his shoulder before he left the room, closing them.

“Goodnight, Sauron.” You whispered, but somehow you were sure he heard it. Taking few more deep breaths, you went to the bed and climb it, curling up in the middle of it. You felt unspeakably exhausted, but fear left you. And even if you felt lonesome, there was a little sparkle of hope lighting in your heart. Maybe somewhere deep within, Sauron was hiding a long forgotten goodness?

And maybe you would be able to find it.


	2. Fondness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Despite her initial emotions, reader finds herself more and more fond of Sauron. And that puts a certain desire in her, which Sauron is more than willing to quench.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: there's a smut part in that chapter.

You woke up to a sun shining brightly onto your face. Blinking, you opened one eye, then the other, and stretched your back, moaning lowly. 

Initially, you fervently looked around an unknown room, fearing that someone kidnapped you. But, as your mind became awake and memories run through it, you realized that you were, in fact, in your quarters in Barad-dûr, your new home after yesterday’s wedding with its owner, Sauron. 

You sighed, sitting on your huge bed and run your fingers through your messy hair. A bath was what you needed, long warm bath to soothe your nerves. 

You looked around again, slowly and cautiously, from the front door, sliding your eyes on a fireplace and, finally, you spotted a door on your right. There was also a big wardrobe next to them, made of black wood. Weary from the events of the day before, you did not notice it. 

Surprised or not, you longed for some release for your shattered nerves, but, being your usual curious self, you wanted to check on what that wardrobe might contain. Jumping from the bed, you approached the furniture and opened it with one swift movement. Your eyes went wide as you stared at whole new set of dresses.  
That was, well, unexpected. To be frank, everything here was beyond what you could imagine. You had no idea how Sauron prepared every detail, but you were well aware of how much power he possessed. 

Closing wardrobe’s door, you moved to open the mystery door next to it. You were pretty sure that there was a bathroom behind it and as you opened it, you learnt that you were right. Stepping inside, you eyed it curiously, admiring its size and structure. In the middle there was a tub curved in the floor, round and big, with a water already in it. You noticed a basket with soaps placed near it and couple of towels next to the basket. 

Nodding in approval of what had been prepared for you, you eagerly got rig of your dress and undergarments and slid in, diving into pleasantly warm water, feeling way more relaxed now. After all, maybe it was not that bad here.

____

Dressed in a new outfit, you opened the door to your chamber and curiously looked around. You saw nothing more than seemingly never-ending corridor, with apparently only one door apart from yours. Somehow, you knew that there was a Sauron’s room there. 

Smoothing your simple long sleeved red dress, you decided to explore your new home. You had to be able to go somewhere else than only your own room, so step by step you walked the corridor and came to stairs. With a shrug, you started to climb them, your curiosity peaking with your every step. Soon, you faced another corridor with locked rooms, so you kept climbing the stairs. 

Few more floors were the same, but finally, you came to a level where corridor was shorter and lead to an open space and you wouldn’t be yourself if you didn’t go there. Feeling a little like a thief, you snaked in on your bare foot and halted on the threshold, gasping in surprise. 

A kitchen. Sauron had a vast kitchen, with beautiful stone worktops on one wall, a black round table in the middle and a line of various shelves, holding every necessary item on a wall opposite the entrance and big windows on a wall on your right. 

You couldn’t help it – you jumped a bit and clapped your hands, smiling widely. Barad-dûr might be a Sauron’s fortress, but – from that day on – this kitchen would be your kingdom. 

Rubbing your hands together you paced the room, looking to every shelf, taking with you everything you needed to prepare a dinner for you and your new husband. You still felt hurt, of course, but you also knew that you were not able to turn back time, thus you could at least get to know Sauron better and maybe form a bond based on mutual respect.  
Something your mother were never able to achieve in a relationship with your father. 

Sighting, you glanced around to check if you gathered everything you would need and after nodding, you began to prepare a meal.  
And since that day, you fell into a routine of dining together with Sauron.

______

You didn’t predict that you would fall for him. During his time in Numenor he seemed to be manipulative and evil, but you had to admit that he had something else inside him – from your chats during the meals you knew that he was always fond of perfection.

Apparently, he saw you as a perfect wife. You would lie if you said it wasn’t flattering. Every day you tried to look more beautiful and every day you would gain a compliment from him. There was nothing you did that he wouldn’t deem as perfect. 

You knew it wasn’t love, not from his side at least, but you felt he respected you. Not once did he force you to anything, not once did you hear any word of pressure.  
However as days passed and you, indeed, had gotten to know Sauron better, a certain need appeared within you. Your bed seemed too big for only one person and occasional chaste kisses you exchanged before going to your separate beds started to be not enough to satisfy your growing need for a little more intimacy. 

You just didn’t know how to articulate or show what you desired. 

Fortunate for you, an opportunity came quite unexpectedly.  
_____

One day, over seventh month of your staying at Barad-dûr, you came in to the kitchen to see a note on the table. 

‘Y/N, can I ask you to bring the meal to forges and dine there?’ it said and you frowned. You never went to the forges. It was Sauron’s work place and you decided that lady’s presence there would be unwelcome. Besides, you feared to see something you wasn’t supposed to. 

But if he directly asked for you to go there? Well, it was something different and you felt a shiver of excitement running through you. Maybe he wanted to show you something?  
Smiling at yourself, you began preparing the meal. 

_____

Holding a basket that contained your dinner, two plates, a bottle of wine and two glasses, you were stepping lower and lower on the stairs, straight to the forges.  
You didn’t know what to expect. You had never been to forges of any kind in Numenor, why would you? The princess was not expected to walk to such places. Apart from great heat, you had no idea what would await you there.

But what you saw as you entered spacious hall was beyond your wildest dreams. And you almost dropped the basket as your gaze lied on Sauron.

He was leaning over a stone table with a hammer in his hand as he was working on something that looked like a sword. He wore only simple black trousers, his bare back was glistened with sweat and you could see strong muscles underneath his skin. His hair, now appearing to be more silver in cold blue flames, was tied in a bun with a piece of cloth, although few strands made their way to his face, which you noticed had a focused, determined expression, his orange, burning eyes fixed on the piece of metal before him.  
You gasped, covering your mouth before your whimper could escape your mouth. Desire clouded your mind as you watched him dropping his hammer over and over again, until he grunted quietly from frustration. You knew that he wanted to make it perfect. 

Trying to fight back a need to jump on him and take him right at that table, you blinked few times and decided to announce yourself with a cough.  
Upon hearing you, Sauron moved his eyes from his task to you and his lips parted as his eyes filled with awe.  
You were wearing black v-necked dress with no sleeves, which covered your curves nicely. Your hair were brushed to a side, cascading over your shoulder in smooth locks, shining in forge’s fire. 

You never looked so breathtaking, even on your wedding day.

Slowly, he laid his hammer on the table, deciding that his work was unimportant for now. He turned to face you and your eyes took an advantage from the view and slid over his broad shoulders, his chest and flat, muscled stomach.

The basket hit the floor with quiet thump. 

“Y/N” Sauron muttered in a hoarse voice and only then you shifted your gaze to look him in the eyes. They were darkened with lust and you felt as heat pooled in your lower abdomen. He did not move, however, frozen few steps from you, his gaze burning your skin, his chest raising and falling in a quick pace of shallow breaths. 

“Kiss me…” you whispered with a plea and, with two big steps, he was in front of you, cupping your face in his big warm palms as soon as he reached you. 

You expected his kiss to be greedy, but he pecked your lips ever so gently, as if he feared you might reject him. He pulled back, but you did not allow him to say anything. Placing your hands on the back of his neck, you brought him to your lips, kissing Sauron with a hunger you never expected yourself of. 

He responded in kind, roaming your back with one of his hands and resting it eventually on the small of it, pulling you closer against his chest. You moved your arms to wrap around his neck, tangling your fingers into his silky hair. 

As your kisses grew deeper and more greedy, you felt your knees getting weak and your head was spinning. Sauron started to push you back and, finally, had you pinned against the wall, moving his hands to your rear to lift you. With a soft moan, you spread your legs and wrapped them around his waist as he dug his fingers into the skin of your hips.  
He moved his greedy lips to your neck, licking and biting soft skin there, causing you to gasp and whimper. You felt him trembling as his own passion was growing, his hardening member pressed against your heat and you ran your fingernails along his back, making him hiss. His teeth grazed your skin and you moaned his name, clenching your fingers on his back. 

“Oh, Y/N…” he muttered against your skin, his hot breath made you shiver and you harshly pulled him for a kiss. Immediately, he licked your lower lip and you parted your mouth to let his tongue in, whimpering as he started to massage yours. 

You ground your hips against Sauron’s hard manhood and he throbbed at that sensation. The need to feel him within you became almost unbearable and you scratched his back slightly before you parted from his lips.

“Not here, please.” you whispered weakly as his hand wandered from your knee to your hip, raising your skirts to expose more of your skin to him. 

“As you wish, my wife.” He smirked at you and you gently brushed his silver hair from his face. He moved his hands to cup your backside again, holding you firmly as he started to carry you out of the forges and into the stairs, leading to higher levels, where your bedroom was. 

“Can’t you move us there with your magic?” you mumbled, lowering your lips to his neck, showering every inch of his soft skin you could reach with hot kisses.

“I cannot focus on anything apart from you right now.” he panted, a hint of teasing in his voice and you giggled, biting on his skin gently and you felt his palms gripping your bum tightly. 

As the two of you were climbing the stairs, Sauron was stopping every now and then to claim your lips, leaving you breathless from a passion he showed you in his intense, messy kisses. You were shivering from anticipation and you encouraged him by whispering your pleas to move quicker into his ear, nibbling on his earlobe. 

He made it to your bedroom in a blink of an eye, almost running to reach the door and open them with one push. He then closed them with a kick and pinned you against them to invade your lips again, putting your desire aflame once more as you whimpered under his touch. His hands moved over your body, exploring every curve, every edge of it, making you weak from arousal. 

“Sauron, I…” you managed to stutter, but somehow he knew. He carried you to your bed, lying you gently on it and kneeling between your parted legs. 

“You are so beautiful, Y/N.” he whispered as he leaned in, kissing you again with even more passion as his hands worked on unlacing your dress. He was fast to disrobe you, tossing the garment aside, looking over your bare form, admiring how lovely you looked in setting sun’s light. 

Tenderly, his fingertips ghosted over your body; from your neck, through your cleavage and around both of your erected nipples, down your stomach and, finally, between your legs, where his talented finger started to rub your swollen clit. 

You were moaning and chanting his name as you rolled your head back, closing your eyes as pleasure began to built within you, threatening to explode every second. 

“Y/N, if you want me to stop at any point-“ Sauron’s concerned voice reached you and you opened your eyes to look at him facing you. 

“This will not be my first time, to be frank.” you admitted bashfully, blushing a little as he stopped his movements on your heat. 

“Hah, so I am not the only bad one here?” he grinned and you bit your lip to hold back a giggle, which soon turned to a moan as Sauron slid a finger inside you, curling it against your inner walls. He pumped it in and out, pushing you closer and closer to an edge, but that wasn’t enough. You had to feel him, right now.  
You moved your trembling hands to his trouser and in no time it was taken off and you palmed his impressive member, stroking it, making him grunt lowly, before he moved his finger out of you and you took your hand off his lad.

Sauron positioned himself at your entrance, looking you straight into your eyes, before he eased inside painfully slowly. You gasped and grasped on the bed sheets as his thickness filled you and you arched your back, jerking your hips forward. 

You began to wrap your legs around his waist, but he put a hand under one of your knee and pushed it up, placing your ankle on his arm, making you cry out as his member slid deeper within you. You placed your hands on his back, caressing them gingerly as he set a pace of long, deep thrusts, hitting on a spot inside you you had never even known was existing. 

His lips started to explore your torso, peppering your skin with sweet kisses, before his tongue circled your nipple and he eventually took it in his mouth, sucking on it gently and you screamed when climax started to creep in your veins. 

Sauron quickened his pumps, slamming on your hips rapidly, growling as your nails dug into his skin when you arched your back, welcoming pure euphoria when it came crashing through you, making you scream his name loudly. Your walls clenched around him your body arched under his and Sauron came undone with low growl, spending himself deep inside you. 

Panting, you absent mindedly ran your fingers through Sauron’s hair. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, placing soft kisses from time to time, sending pleasant tickles as he leisurely traced a pattern on your stomach. 

“By your reaction, I assume that you are rather fond of dining in the forges.” Sauron said playfully, biting on your skin and you giggled. 

“I most certainly am. However, I think you are not going there today. Or tomorrow.” You grinned, cupping his face to pull him into a sweet kiss, relaxing as his arms wrapped around you tightly. 

His forges could wait, your kitchen could wait, too, to be honest, the entire word could wait and you didn’t mind. 

Spending time in bed with Sauron was more than worth it.


	3. Loss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader must face the result of her husband's schemes, as well as the fact that even her love cannot change the Dark Lord. Or can it?
> 
> Based on an imagine (Imagine being forced into a marriage with Sauron) from imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com

Something was wrong. Something was terribly not right, but you couldn’t understand what and why. 

It had been over two weeks your mother last wrote to you. Since you had moved to Barad-dûr, you and your mother maintained contact through letters, usually sent once a week. She wasn’t very fond of your strengthening bond with Sauron, nor of your growing feelings toward him, but she was happy that you were safe and respected there.  
You, on the other hand, were more and more concerned about what was happening in Númenor. In a cold light of the moon , your eyes went through your mother’s neat handwriting, studying the letter for maybe a hundredth time. 

My dearest child,  
I fear it might be the last time I am writing to you. A shadow has come upon our home and, I believe, the one of your husband’s. Your father’s mind is poisoned with terrifying ideas, ones which he could never come to by himself.  
A temple has been built, taller and brighter than any I have ever seen. It is said it will be used to offer gifts for a Lord mightier than the Valar. Sacrifices rather than gifts, I assume, and, from what I heard, that Lord is no other then Morgoth, your husband’s previous master. Your father keeps mumbling prayers to him over and over again.  
At the very day I am writing that letter, your father himself cut down and burnt the white tree. I do not know of the purpose of such action, but it can be nothing good. He is repeating that eternal life awaits him and everyone who join him, should they took a chance and call a war against the Valar.  
Your father is more than willing to do it.  
Y/N, you must run. Sauron somehow managed to corrupt your father, even from a far. He is an evil itself, you must understand! I am too weak to stand against your father, I am too weak to protect you, I can only beg you to run away from him and hide somewhere safe.  
Please, believe me.  
Your mother 

You fought back the tears that gathered in your eyes. A part of you was refusing to believe your mother’s words, but a weak voice in your head said that it was true. Sauron was corrupted and he would manipulate to achieve his goals, but you couldn’t bring yourself to believe that he was able to do such things to you. 

You hid your concerns from him, of course, and it was rather easy, for you noticed that he trusted you more and more with every passing day. You still couldn’t guess if it was love, but the truth was Sauron looked differently at you. And after what happened in the forges you had no problems with turning his attention elsewhere.  
To be honest, you enjoyed sharing your bed with him more than you were ready to admit. 

You focused your attention on your mother’s words again. You sent her a reply, but you had not gotten any yet. You feared you would never hear from your mother again, if what she wrote was true. And you had no reason to think otherwise, even if your heart screamed that your husband couldn’t do anything to hurt in any way.  
A light footsteps behind your back made you gasp from surprise and you folded the letter quickly, hiding it in a pocket of your robe. A second later, Sauron’s arm crept around your waist, pushing your back against his firm chest. His skin was warm and you sighed with content at that sensation. Your heart and mind, however, were still heavy with worry and dread, and you couldn’t fully relax in your husband’s embrace. 

“What troubles you, Y/N?” his deep whisper sent shivers along your body, his breath tickled your skin, yet you were tensed. 

“Nothing. Just some silly worries.” You mumbled, looking at him over your shoulder and he smiled softly. He seemed to smile more often lately. 

“How can I help to ease them?” you heard genuine concern in his voice and your heart ached a little. You wanted to tell him everything, to reveal out loud every thought that was in your head, but you knew you couldn’t. You couldn’t just say that your mother deemed his guilty of everything that was happening in your homeland and that you agreed with her. 

“Hold me. It will be enough.” You turned to face him and he nodded, placing a single kiss on your forehead. After you took off your robe, you climbed the bed, Sauron joining you in no time and you laid your head on his chest, comforted by his arms, wrapped protectively around you. 

You heard him muttering some words in an unknown language and your felt dizzy. He always whispered something before you fell asleep, making your head spin, but you tended to think it was because of your rather intense lovemaking. 

“You do this again. Make me feel unsteady, that is.” Muttering sleepily, you nuzzled against his chest and you heard Sauron’s chuckle. 

“Sleep now, Y/N, you surely need it.” he kissed your temple and in next second, you fell asleep. 

____________

It was dawning when a thunder woke you up. Your bed was shaking, everything in your chamber was shaking, in fact, all fortress was trembling and you froze for a moment, before you jumped out of bed and ran to a window. 

Sauron was nowhere to be seen, but he always left before you opened your eyes. You leant against the wall next to the window to steady yourself, and, to your utter terror, you saw that whole ground was quivering. 

Far away on the horizon, when Númenor laid, you saw lightning, thousands of them, shot on the island over and over again, from a crack between dark clouds. A loud rumbles followed every one of them and, what was even more terrifying, you noticed a wave, growing bigger and taller ever second. You shouted, pleading the Valar to stop this madness, but they did not. 

You felt as whole world stopped its turning as the wave fell on Númenor, drowning it to the highest trees, wiping your homeland away right before your eyes and you fell on your knees, unable to believe it. 

It was gone, your home was gone. You tried to lie to yourself that maybe your mother somehow fled, but you witnessed the fall. It took everything, no ship would be safe.  
You sobbed violently, curling on the cold ground, not even bothering to reach the bed. For you, time stood still, you did not notice that everything was silent, you did not felt as hours passed, you did not heard Sauron’s heavy thumps until he stormed into your chamber, running to your side.

“Y/N?” he called, his voice trembling, he was looking with fear in his eyes at your pale face, flushed cheeks and red, swollen eyes. As soon as you fixed your gaze at him, you remembered what your mother wrote. 

“You!” you shouted accusingly, standing up in a matter of seconds and narrowing his eyes at him. “You did this, Sauron!” 

“I do not know-“ 

“Don’t you dare lie.” Coldly, you interrupted him and he stood up from his crouching position, facing you. His face was emotionless, his eyes started to burn with fire. “You kept corrupting my father, didn’t you? You didn’t stop even after he gave me to you, did you? You needed to prove some sick point of yours, am I right?” 

“Yes.” He answered simply, his voice indifferent and that shot a knife through your heart. You clenched on your chest, when another sob escaped your mouth. 

“Why?” you muttered weakly, blinking when tears streamed down your face. “People I love were there, Sauron, my mother was there…” you tried to explain, to make him realize what he had done, but, as you looked at him, you realized that he knew very well how his schemes would end. And that put a fury ablaze within you.

In two steps you approached him, grasping on his arms and digging your nails deep in his skin, but he seemed unmoved by it. 

“Y/N, please…” he whispered, but that vexed you even more.

“Do not call my name again, you monster! How could you do that to me, tell me! And I thought… that I-“ you gasped for an air and you saw a smirk forming on his lips.

“Love me? Oh, Y/N, can you not see that love never brings anything good? Your mother loved you and look where it led you. Love makes one weaker not stronger, my wife. Love destroys, not creates.” Sauron’s voice was mocking, and you searched his eyes for a lie, but found none. He really thought that and you felt new stream of tears leaving your eyes.

“Leave.” You demanded, pushing him away from you. “Leave and never come here again! Do not touch me, do not look at me again!” you were hitting his chest with balled fist, forcing him to step back until he reached the door, he had left open. “You are the evil itself, Sauron,” you added, trying to tell it with all venom you could muster, “and I wish you killed me in a second I married you.” 

Having said that, you shut the door, before he could response. Taking slow steps, you reached your bed and collapsed on it, finally able to let go and simply weep. You cried and cried and cried, as the events of last hours sank in, tearing your heart into million pieces. In your despair, you failed to hear Sauron screaming your name from behind your door, his loud angry and hurt growls as he ran to his forges, where he scattered everything he could reach, destroying all the work he had done, trying to let go of the emotions he felt, the ones you ignited inside him.

But the most important thing you failed to notice was a single tear that ran on his cheek when your door closed before him.


	4. Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In her despair, reader confronts Sauron about his deeds, which leads to yet another discover. 
> 
> Based on an imagine (Imagine being forced into a marriage with Sauron) found at imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the end, there is a part written in Sauron's POV.

Days were turning into nights, sun was raising and setting, but you were indifferent to it. You were lying in your bed, in a same position as days? weeks? months? ago – you did not know.

All eternity could pass and you wouldn’t notice. Your days were filled with tears and weeping or sleep which brought you no comfort. In your dreams, nightmares rather, you were seeing the fall of Númenor as if you were right there, among your people, with your mother at your side. With a scream you would wake up and immediately start to cry over the fate of your beloved homeland, caused by your corrupted husband’s schemes.

Speaking of whom – not once during your mourning had you seen him nor heard him. If he came to your room, it must have been while you were sleeping. Every morning a mysterious someone placed a silver tray with a food on your desk, but you barely nibbled on a meal. You were too numb and felt too empty to even think of eating.

You felt as if all the joy you had ever feel, all the love you had ever experienced was drown along the island, and what you had left were sorrow and emptiness.   
Even thought of Sauron stopped irritating you, nor were you feeling blazing hatred towards him. There was just nothing in your heart and a thousands of questions in your head, which only he could answer. 

And, from what you heard during your restless hours of shedding tears, Sauron was spending all his time in the forges, yelling at his servants or destroying what he had done so far, furious and broken by your absence. But you weren’t ready to face him, not yet, not after what you had witnessed and what was his deed. 

But, as more and more days went by, you started to hear Sauron pacing the corridor anxiously, stopping few times before your door, but not knocking on it. Once or twice you wanted to run and open it and let him hold you or kiss away your pain, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. Your despair was still too fresh.

And, frankly, you were sure it would never pass.

______  
You heard your door being open and then closed and you opened your eyes, turning your gaze there. It was barely dawning, your vast room was gloomy and cold, with no fire lit in the fireplace. 

A tall, slim figure appeared in your sight and you instantly sat up, narrowing your eyes.

“Leave.” you hissed through clenched teeth, but Sauron ignored it. With no word spoken, he walked to your desk, placed a silver tray there and looked at you with eyes filled with concern.

“Y/N, you must eat.” 

“No. I will not.” Your voice was weak and when he approached your bed and sat on it, you tried to move away, but your body was too weakened to do so. 

“Please.” Sauron whispered, shifting closer to you and, tenderly, he reached for your hand and covered it with his warm one. “I vowed to take care of you. Let me do so.” 

“No vow bonds you now, my dear husband.” you muttered sarcastically and Sauron took a sharp breath. Despite your harsh words, he stood up and brought the tray with him, placing it on his lap when he resumed his position at your side. 

“Please, Y/N.” he repeated, almost begging you to agree, with sadness and worry in his voice, and eventually you nodded, letting him feed you. 

You didn’t talk more during your meal as you slowly ate every bite of dish Sauron brought to your lips. It was tasteful, but most importantly – nourishing and you could feel as strength was coming back to your pale and weak body. Once you finished it, Sauron put the tray back, and upon coming back to your bed, not even speaking a word or asking for your permission, he moved his one arm around your waist and the other under your knees, lifting you effortlessly. You did not protest, partly because of your still weak state and partly because you, indeed, needed to be taken care of. 

He carried you to the bathroom, where a hot bath was already awaiting. You didn’t ask how, you didn’t even wonder. So many things unnatural were happening here that you grew to simply accept them. 

Sauron gently put you on your feet, stepping behind you to unlace your dress. As it hit the floor, in short moment, he disrobed himself as well and helped your step into the bathtub, sliding there right after you.

Automatically, you sat down, letting him sit behind you. You bent your knees and brought them to your chest, folding your arms around them. In wasn’t an attempt to cover yourself, you just still didn’t feel warm. 

After taking a vanilla soap from a basket next to the bathtub, Sauron began to lather it, making round delicate circles on your back. 

“Y/N-“

“Don’t. I do not wish to hear anything from you. There is no possible explanation for what you had done.” 

He took a deep breath, before he spoke again, ignoring your words or just deciding to say what he wanted despite them. 

“They took him away. They chained him, tormented him and threw him into the void. And, out of sudden, I was left alone, hopeless and scared.   
At first, I was lost, unsure of what I must do next, of how should I live without him. But I knew one thing. He must have been avenged and I was to do it.”

“He?” you looked at him over your shoulder with a frown. 

“Melkor. Or Morgoth, as you know him.” 

It was your turn to take a sharp inhale as you tried to sort out what he just revealed. On some wicked side, his actions could be understandable, but that didn’t make you feel any better. In fact, you felt worse, as thought it was even possible.

“Did you feel something for him?” you asked after minutes of silence, trying to find deeper source of why loss of Melkor moved him so.

“No, at least not what you think. Maybe he did, but he never spoke of it. I admired him and his thirst for independence. He was mightier and greater than you can imagine, Y/N, and I am grateful than I could stand by his side.” he confessed patiently, now moving his hands to your shoulder and arm, waiting for any question you might have. 

“You kept saying some strange words when in bed with me. What were they?” 

His hands stopped. You turned around to face him and you saw on his pale face a look of complete agony. A shiver run down your spine, making dread flood all over your body and mind. 

“A spell.” 

“Of what kind? Sauron, what have you done to me?” 

He hesitated before he put the soap aside, lowering his hands under the water. 

“It was Dark Sorcery. I-I… you were mortal, Y/N…”

“Were?”

“No longer you are.”

Your wide open eyes searched his ones for a lie or a mockery, but there were none. It appeared he told the truth, and by shameful gaze you guessed that now he started to regret it. 

“I am immortal now? You made me immortal?!” you took a trembling breath as your mind still proceeded that fact and all of consequences of it. If it was true, and you had no reason not to believe it, you would live forever and have to cope with loss of your homeland through all the ages that laid before you. Forever you were bound to Sauron, not only by wrong decision of your father, but now by also Sauron’s wicked idea and dark magic that run in your veins. 

A sob escaped your lips as you realized that from that day on you would stay in Barad-dûr till your final hour, for you had nowhere to walk away to. 

“Leave me alone. I cannot look at you.” you murmured, feeling as the tears started to run down your cheeks and Sauron obliged, quickly departing from the bath, then the bathroom, gathering his clothes in his way out, and finally from your room, giving you what you asked for. A time for another tears, another weeping, but this time, not only over your lonesome, filled with unfairness, live, but also over his miserable one, which you only could guess was full of hurt and misunderstanding. 

_______

Sauron’s POV

It was hard and painful to leave her, but I did. Who was I to refuse her after promising her no further torment? And after breaking that very promise countless times? 

It was not my intention to make her suffer, but my excuses were irrelevant. However, I had to explain my actions, even if Y/N would not fully understand them. 

I closed her door silently and took those few steps to enter my room, collapsing on my bed as soon as I reached it. It seemed cold, but there was not a surprise to me. I was used to it. However, having her so close, yet so far, made it even colder.

I never knew and never expected that I would grow to love her. I was not aware that I was able to feel that emotion, not until she accepted our marriage and came to Barad-dûr with me. It was then when it started to creep upon me.

I was afraid, I admit. And I began to question my own decisions, but what was already sat and in motion, could not be stopped. Númenor had to fall, it was inevitable. 

I simply did not predict that Y/N would be wedded to me and that she would be the cause of my second thoughts. I never had them, not even in Master Aüle’s forges, when I was called Mairon. I did not have them when I let Melkor corrupt me and agreed to work for him. I do not regret anything I had done, there was only thing so far that made my heart quiver. 

Y/N’s tears.

And I was the one who caused them. That thought hurt me and there was nothing I could do about it. No amount of destroyed projects, of slain servants or their broken bones could take my pain away.

I have told her that love made one weaker and I fully agreed with that. She was making me weak, but I started to live for her smiles, her closeness, her stories, and every time I was gifted with a feel of her warm body against mine, I could not help but think of a way to keep it forever. 

So I found a spell. And I performed it on her, without her awareness, because I knew she would refuse. And that, one day, would be the death of me. 

I could not risk losing her, even if that meant she would hate me from that day on. I could handle it, whole Arda is hating me. I only wished to have her by my side for as long as I could, but that few years which were a life of Men, weren’t enough.

I run my hands over my face and, much to my surprise, I sense a wetness on it. I have never cried and I don’t know the reason of them. 

But I have no time to wonder about it, for a weak knock on my door reached my ears…


	5. Stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Despite what he had done, reader needs Sauron to comfort her, which he willingly does, along with that confessing something his wife was not expecting.
> 
> Based on an imagine (Imagine being forced into a marriage with Sauron) found at imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a smut part in this chapter.

Anxiously folding your hands behind your back, you were staring at Sauron’s door, questioning your decision to come there. He was the cause of all your despair, however, your heart stupidly ached for his closeness and you couldn’t help but, in time of overwhelming sorrow, ask for it. 

It took him a while to open the door and, when he did, he immediately shifted to the side to let you in. 

“I have but one question.” you said as you hesitantly stepped in. You had never been there before, so your eyes wandered around the spacious room bathed in the red light of the sun. It was all black, but that wasn’t surprising. 

“Yes?” Sauron asked from behind your back. You turned around to face him and you noticed that he wasn’t even looking at you. You inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly. 

“May I stay here? I cannot bear being alone in my room for any longer.” your voice was shaking due to the tears gathering once more in your eyes, and Sauron jerked his head to look at you. A disbelief was evident in his wide open eyes, but upon finally taking in your sight – slightly trembling body, watery eyes and still dump hair – he simply opened his arms, hoping that it wasn’t too much for you.

Truth be told, it was all you wanted and needed at that moment. 

You readily threw yourself in his arms, burying your face in the crook of his neck and letting go of the tears. He encircled his arms around you, cradling your head with one of his warm hands, tenderly combing your locks in a comforting matter. You didn’t know how long had been standing there, but when you eventually leaned your head back to look at him, you noticed that his eyes were red as well.

He turned his head to a side, looking at a wall, trying to avoid your eyes.

Second thoughts were running wild in your mind but, ignoring them, you lifted yourself on your toes and placed a soft kiss on his cheek, feeling as a shiver run through his body. 

“Thank you.” in a voice not louder than a whisper, you muttered against the skin of his collarbone as you rested your forehead there. Only then you realized that he was half bare, having put only his trousers on a way to answer your knocking.

“You have nothing to thank me for, Y/N. So far, I have brought you only hurt.” he admitted bitterly as a sad smile spread on his lips. Even if he didn’t regret causing the downfall of your homeland immediately after the deed, he surely might feel it seeing your pain. And that was something he didn’t thought you would ever forgive him.

“Why would you care about a pain of a person, who is indifferent to you, Sauron?” 

“You are not indifferent to me, Y/N. I do…” he took a sharp breath and you lifted your eyes at him again. There was something in his eyes, something you didn’t witness before and your lips parted from surprise. 

“I have learnt so much and still, I do not know how to speak of it. I posses such powers, and yet I cannot show it. I was told it makes one weak and I, indeed, am weakened as I never been before. And I am afraid, Y/N. Tell me, what have you done to me that made me so fragile?” 

Hearing the torment in his voice, feeling the tremble of his body as he spoke and, finally, looking into his eyes and realizing that it was dread you saw earlier, made your heart ache to console him, to just hold him in your arms. It appeared he needed you and couldn’t even verbalize that need. 

“Sauron,” you slowly reached your head to cup his cheek and turn his face to look at you. “Sauron, please, look at me.” 

“I do not want your pity.” he murmured angrily, but fixed his gaze on your eyes. 

“Listen to me and listen carefully. What you feel is the most difficult emotion, but it is beautiful if reciprocated. And I can assure you that yours is. All you must do is learn how to show it, but I am here, Sauron, I am here and I am ready to teach you.” 

“Why? After all I have done?” he asked, unable to believe in any word you uttered. His voice was shaking, his eyes – for the first time visibly to you – filled with tears and you cradled his face with both your hands, stroking his cheeks.

“Because I love you.” 

Upon hearing it, Sauron gave up and let the tears stream down his cheeks. It was your turn to comfort him as you wrap your arms around him, leading his head on your shoulder, running your fingers through his silver hair, as he finally let himself be weak. You were placing a kiss on his temple every now and when his sobs turned to heavy pants, he lifted his shame-filled eyes at you, not sure how would you react. 

But you knew. You smiled reassuringly at him, wiping the wetness from his cheeks with your thumbs and, gently, led his lips to yours, kissing him shortly.

“Y/N…” 

“Let me.” You kissed him again and this time he kissed you back, his hands creeping on your back, pushing you closer to him.

You moved your hands to his shoulders, making him take a step back, and then another and another, gradually reaching the bed. His kisses grew hungrier and more passionate and he licked your lower lip. You gladly obliged, parting your mouth to welcome his tongue and he started to massage yours. 

When he bumped against the bed, you let your hands wander down his chest, over his stomach and, when they reached his waist, you unlaced his trousers, letting then fall down. Sauron reached for your hand to stop you from further manifestations, still not sure if that was truly what you wanted, but you pushed his hand away and circled your fingers around his hard member, slowly pumping up and down. 

He moaned in the kiss, making a shiver ran down your spine and a wave of heat to pool between your legs. With your other hand you led him to sit on the bed and, thanking yourself that you chose a dress with frontal lacing, you quickly disrobed yourself, kicking the garment aside. 

All the while, Sauron was watching you, his eyes filled with amaze for your beauty and you saw him throbbing with anticipation. As you took a step closer, he leaned in, meeting your naked torso with his hot and greedy lips, and he showered you with kisses. He kissed your collarbone, he kisses down your cleavage, paying much welcomed attention to your breast. He kissed and licked your stomach and, sometime between his exploration, he slid a finger along your slick, parting your folds. 

You cried out, but didn’t let him do more. Instead, you gently moved his palm on your hip and, placing your hands on his shoulders, you straddled him, slowly lowering his hips and sliding down on his had erection.

Sauron gasped as he filled you, letting a shaky moan out and tightening his grasp on your hips. You gave yourself a moment to adjust to thickness, using it to kiss him messy yet deeply and it made him throb again inside you. 

And then you finally began to move. You were barely moving up his length, not wanting to part any further than necessary, and Sauron guided your hips up and down, helping you find your perfect rhythm. Every falling was marked by your pleasure filled cry and Sauron’s strangled moan, and you dug your fingers into his skin, scratching his shoulders.  
He was thrusting in as you fell back on him, hitting that sweet spot inside you that made your head spin with every pump. One of his hands traveled up to cup your breast and he started to knead it, brushing his thumb over your hard and sensitive nipple from time to time. 

You began to rock your hips harder, feeling your bliss coming closer and closer and when Sauron left your breast and lowered his hand between your legs to rub your clit, you came undone, screaming his name and trembling in his arms as pure euphoria came crashing through your body. 

As your walls clenched around him, Sauron gave in to the pleasure, too, and growled as his own climax came. He rested his forehead against your collarbone, kissing your skin, and you cradled his head, placing sweet kisses atop it. 

“Stay with me,” he pleaded, his voice barely a whisper, trembling and unsure. 

“I will.” You assured him and Sauron held you closer, if even possible. 

Soon, he lifted you in his arms, and laid you on his bed, still unwilling to let you go as he wrapped his arms around your back and you placed your head on his chest. You were the first to fall asleep, Sauron however couldn’t rest, with thousands of thoughts racing in his mind. 

Having been given forgiveness yet or not, he was aware of one thing. In a way unknown and not entirely understandable to him, he won your love. And he vowed to himself that, from that day on, he would do anything to fully deserve it.


	6. Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader is witnessing how Sauron's desire to retrieve The Ring drives him further into madness, and decides that this has to change.
> 
> Based on an imagine (Imagine being forced into a marriage with Sauron) found at imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com

You swung your legs leisurely as you were sitting on the one of Sauron’s worktables in his vast forges. He was leaning over a worktable next to yours, his brow knitted in focus and determination as he was fixing his armor.

“I do not want you to go.” you said for what might have been a thousandth time, sorrow and worry filling your voice and Sauron sighed quietly. 

“I must, Y/N, my presence in Dol Guldur has been discovered. It will not take long for an army to march on Barad-dûr and I do wish for you to suffer.” 

“I understand that, Sauron, but they had already hurt you once, why do this to yourself again?” you tried to reason him, turning your concerned gaze at his face and you saw he closed his eyes, trying to steady his shaking hands. 

“The Ring is gone!” out of sudden, his voice turned louder and he opened his eyes to look at you with agony and anger. The loss of his One Ring pained him more than physical wounds he had suffered, and even if you managed to heal them, that particular injury, however, was out of your reach as a healer. Even as a wife. 

Not even one muscle quivered on your face at his outburst. You were used to them, they had been happening every now and then since his return from the Battle of the Last Alliance. Scattered and bleeding, he was carried into his fortress by Orcs, and you feared that a time had come you would lost him. 

You ordered the creatures to lay him on his chamber and leave you alone with him. Sauron wasn’t even able to resist as you took off his spiked helmet and the rest of his now dirty and broken armor and began examining his injured form. He did not look as the man you took as a husband long time ago in Númenor, but you were aware that he had changed his form to a greater and frightening one, before taking off for the battle. 

Carefully, you tended on his cuts, cleaning and bandaging them. And for days you waited at his bed, for him to come back to his strengths, patiently changing bandages if needed and praying that your husband would wake up. 

It took weeks for him to heal enough to open his eyes. ‘They took The Ring’, he had said as a first thing, soon followed by tears running down his cheeks, ‘I was afraid they would take you as well’, he added and only then you let yourself cry. 

But Sauron’s pain did not stop when the wounds healed. The One Ring was the most important thing for him, even more important than you and the fact that it was taken away and kept somewhere out of Sauron’s reach left an enormous hurt hidden in his mind, stinging every day since the battle. 

And soon, he became obsessed with retrieving it. As soon as he was able to walk by himself and his power slowly restored, he began looking for it, but to no avail. Ages had past and it seemed that only your love kept him sane. 

You, on the other hand, were as peaceful as ever. After fully accepting your immortality, you started to fill your time with activities what had never crossed your mind before. You had learnt how to sew, you explored every single room in the fortress and found a spacious library with hundreds of books, most of them in languages unknown to you. So you learnt them as well. 

You were also a regular visitor to Sauron’s forges, curious of what he was creating there. A birth of every horrid creature you witnessed, growing more and more worried of his strengthening drive to find what he had lost. 

And now, that very drive led him to yet another battle, which you feared he might not return from.

“That I know.” you said patiently as you watched his changing expression. From distraught it turned into regret and hurt and he left a bodice of his armor on the table and approached you. 

You searched his face, his features so familiar to your eyes and your fingers as you gently cupped his face. Sauron leaned into your hands, placing one of his large ones on your, the other gingerly landed on your thigh. 

“Promise me you will return unharmed.” 

“I cannot, Y/N. I do not expect many enemies, yet I am sure they will be strong. I have captured a wizard and that only means I may encounter a power I did not think of.” he mused, frowning his brow. “But do not fret. I have some creatures to protect me there.” 

“You had an army last time.” you replied, emotionless, yet your eyes filled with tears. You didn’t even want to imagine in what state he might come back if he was outnumbered.

Sauron only sighed, taking one step closer to you and wrapping an arm around your waist, moving his hand from yours to your cheek, stroking it tenderly. 

“I can promise one thing. I shall be back to you, Y/N.” he focused his sight on your eyes, and you saw that he meant every single word he just said. You gave a weak smile in response and simply brought his lips to yours, kissing him softly. 

“When will you leave?” you asked when you parted, still keeping him as close as you could. 

“At dawn.” 

“Then you still have enough time to bid farewell to your wife.” you muttered, wrapping your arms around his neck and Sauron did not need any other encouragement as he lifted you in his arms and carried to his bed, when a long and proper goodbye was said between you and your husband. 

And when the first rays of sun, red and bloody, crept onto your face, he was already gone.   
______

Impatiently, you paced the stairs, up and down, up and down, going miles and miles as you waited for Sauron’s return. You hoped it would not last for days, your already weakened mind could not bear longer waiting, full of fright for his life. 

Day had passed and you watched as the sun set on the horizon, when you saw a explosion of a light and you felt a quake. You ran down the stairs, to the front gate, but half way through you met an Orc. 

“Master is back.” it barked and before you could even ask, the look on its face told you everything. 

“Take him to his chamber.” you ordered, mentally preparing yourself for carrying for his lifeless body again. Climbing the stairs you reached a corridor leading to his quarters and you moved aside to let the Orcs pass, with your husband’s body in his arms. 

You followed them, ordering them to leave as soon as they laid Sauron on his bed. You felt the tears stinging your eyes, but despite your blurry vision, you removed the armor, broken and useless, and after fetching warm water and a cloth, you began cleaning his wounds.

He had lost the form you met him in again. His skin was grey as if all the blood was gone out of his system. He was cold and unconscious, but when you touched his wrist you sensed a pulse. Settled down a bit by that, you started to chant healing incantations as you tended on Sauron’s many injuries. Taking your time, you carefully bandaged them and only them you looked at his face, hoping that he might be awake by now.

He was not. And only thing you could do was to wait at his bed, once again praying that Sauron would open his eyes. 

It took him almost three months. 

You were slowly losing your hope, but his wounds were healed, when why was he still sleeping? During the nights you would beg him to wake up and during the days you were telling him about everything that had happened, hoping that maybe your voice would bring him back to you. 

Nothing worked until one evening, when despair took the best of you. 

“I miss you, Sauron. I am aware that it is an unfamiliar feeling to you, yet I cannot help it. I cannot bear losing you, do you hear?” you squeezed his limp hand, so cold in yours and you gave up to the tears that threatened to fall. “I did not expect, did not want to love you, but I do, and now as you are somewhere unreachable for me, it seems I do not have a purpose anymore. if you are away, if you are to remain that way, what need is for me to stay here?” usually, you kept such thoughts to yourself, not voicing them in fear that he might hear, but now, as so many days pass by and he was still unconscious, you let yourself confess what was on your mind. 

He would not wake up anyway. 

“I have only you left, and you made me feel loved, how can you torment me like that then? What have I done to be put through this again? If I could, I would stop you, but who am I to stand against the Dark Lord?” you laughed bitterly, wiping your cheeks with the back of your palm. “I am no one, not even a human anymore, because of you. But I forgive you, Sauron, I have long forgiven you, even if you feel unworthy of it, even if you still feel guilty. Please, come back to me, beloved…” 

Your last words came out as a whisper and you hid your face in your palms, sobbing quietly, when suddenly you felt a weak pressure on your arm. 

“I do not deserve your tears, Y/N.” 

His hardly audible sour mutter snapped you out of weeping and you grasped his palm, putting it against your cheek, smiling with relief. 

“You are still here, by my side. Why?” 

“Because I vowed to take care of you, remember? And I am doing so.” you smiled wider as you repeated the words he had once said to you, and that made Sauron’s lips spread in a small, yet warm smile. 

“I have failed. Again. I am too weak, Y/N.” his eyes filled with tears and you reached to gently cradle his cheek. 

“Rest, Sauron. Do not think about it right now.” 

“Will you lay with me?” he asked quietly and you nodded, cautiously climbing on the bed and laying next to him, circling an arm around his chest. You kissed his forehead and when he closed his eyes, his eyelids, lying your head carefully on his arm as he scooped you closer, wrapping an arm around your back. 

And before you fell asleep, long after Sauron drifted off into a slumber, you decided that you would find a way to take him away from a path he had chosen, for it would bring nothing more than his death, which only meant a fall of his fortress, alongside with you inside it. And that wasn’t a thing you could agree on, you had to somehow prevent it from happening. Which led to a single thing.

You had to scheme behind your husband’s back.


	7. Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader decides to fulfill her plan to save Sauron, however she needs a help of a certain wizard.
> 
> Based on an imagine (Imagine being forced into a marriage with Sauron) found at imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com

You watched your husband’s face as the red sun rose, looking for any sign of awaking. You hoped that it would take him very long time to woke up, just as you planned it would.

The other evening as you prepared a glass of wine for him, you poured couple of drops of a potion you had made earlier. You needed him to sleep as long as possible, for that day you would finally start fulfilling your plan.

You had spent countless hours at the library, learning how to properly prepare a sleep potion strong enough to work. Sauron was still weak after the events in Dol Guldur, yet you had to be sure everything would go as you wished.

Apart from studying a potions book, you also took time to gain more knowledge about wizards. It appeared they were rather helpful and very powerful, with possible opportunities to  contact the Valar. And that was precisely what you must have done to disconnect Sauron from the Ring, and as a result to save him from death.

You knew the Ring had been found. Sauron was furious when he sensed it, somewhere in the Shire, which you later found out to be a land inhabited by hobbits. He had sent Black Riders to retrieve it, and by what he had observed, the Ring-bearer was on the journey to Imladris, a house of elves.

Your plan was to somehow go there and offer your help, but the most important purpose was to find a wizard, other than the White one, who, much to your surprise, willingly worked under Sauron’s orders.

Sauron twitched in his sleep, but did not open his eyes. You gently run your fingers through his silver hair, which usually woke him up, but not this time. Luckily for you, the potion worked, and you cautiously got out of it, heading to the bathroom. After quick morning toilet, you dressed in a long sleeved black gown, and took a red cape.

You headed to the stairs and went down it, almost to the lowest level of the fortress. Your husband kept there all the creatures he had bread, among which the flying fell beasts were vital for you. Sauron’s Eye had been watching everything, yet you managed to secretly learn how to ride the beasts and gained trust of one of them.

And the Eye was not present, at least for now. You learnt the difference between the time when he was truly asleep and the time when he was observing the movement of the Ring or his enemies, and then the Eye formed itself on the top of the Barad-dûr, giving him access to every place in Middle-Earth.

Unseen by the Eye, you approached one of the creatures, the one that grew fond of you.  It grunted excitedly and you quickly gave it an apple you took from kitchen, to silent his noises.

“Now,” you muttered softly as you scratched the beast’s jaw, gaining a low happy hum from it, “we will go for a ride, okay?”

Another excited growl reached your ears, and smiling to yourself, you carefully climbed onto the creature, sitting between its wings, and grasping on reins. Then  you pushed  your heels to its sides, giving a mark to set off and the beast spread its wings and pushed itself from the ground.

Your journey to meet a wizard began.

You thought it would take at least a day, but the fell beast landed before the entrance to Rivendell after only few hours. You secured your cape, taking off the hood, and ordered the creature to stay in a place. Then, you slowly walked through the gate and was immediately stopped by the guards that run down the stairs.

You moved your arms in the air, showing your open palms as you eyed the elves, pointing their weapons at you.

“I wish to speak with a wizard.” You announced loudly, not even for a second letting your fear to be visible. Despite your composed pose and stern expression, your insides were filled with dread. You were afraid that, even if your intentions were peaceful and you did not want to harm anyone, they would held you captive because of the simple fact that you were married to the Dark Lord.

One of the guards came forward, his bright blue eyes were searching your figure for any weapon, but they found none. His gaze slid briefly over the beast, but the creature stood still just as you ordered it.

Nodding, the guard beckoned you to follow him and, sighing you did so, climbing the stairs and then, admiring the beauty of the place, walked through corridors and up more stairs as he led you to a balcony, where you stumbled upon what seemed to be a meeting between various races.

Your eyes took in the gathering, from the elf that was sitting on your right; you guessed he was the lord of this place, through the Men and more elves and finally, you looked at a hobbit, who sat beside an old man in a grey robe.

When the hobbit’s eyes met yours you felt a strange flicker of your heart, which you understood only when you noticed a thick chain around his neck.

“You carry the Ring…” you panted as your eyes filled with sadness.

“And you are…?” the elf on your right asked, standing up from his seat and facing you.

“My name is Y/N, I am… was the princess of Númenor before its fall. I am looking for a wizard.” You heard a collective gasp and the elf before knitted his brows before looking significantly at the old man in grey, who stood up as well, coming to you in a slow steps.

“That would be me, who you look for, my dear.” He said in a kind tone, a small smile tugging on his lips and you felt a bit safer.

“I do not have much time, master wizard, but I come with an urgent matter. If you are to destroy the Ring, and I truly hope you will succeed, I must safe my husband from vanishing along with it. I do not know of any way to contact the Valar, so please, can you do it on my behalf?” you explained fervently, words running from your mouth quickly, and you grabbed the wizard’s hand as you spoke.

He was looking at you curiously, but you saw a surprise in his eyes when you mentioned the Valar and your wish you rescue Sauron from death. However, he nodded slowly.

“So it is true. You were, indeed, wedded to the Dark Lord” he muttered, more to himself, but you nodded to confirm it.

Behind his back, there were voices of confusion and utter surprise, demanding an explanation of what was happening. yet your eyes were focused only on the wizard’s ones, and much to your relief, you did not notice hatred or anger, or any negative emotion. He was willing to help you and that made you sigh with relief.

“I will protect the little one as much as I can, yet I cannot guarantee anything. Sauron might be weak, but he is determined to have the Ring back and he will do everything to take it. You must be careful, his Eye sees your every move.”

“And what do you wish me to do, my lady?” the wizard asked after bowing his head with gratitude for your words.

“I am aware that my husband is bond to the Ring with Dark Sorcery. I wish you to ask the Valar to safe him. They are able to do it, I know this. I, however, am not able to contact them, not from Barad-dûr.”

“Understood. But you know that even if the Valar save him, Sauron will be taken to Valinor-“

“I will save him. I must save him, master wizard.” Your eyes became watery, but your voice was steady and sure and the wizard gave you a reassuring smile when you blinked the tears away.

“Gandalf, my lady. And I will gladly help you, but please tell me, are there any moths in the fortress?”

You frowned, surprised by his question. “Yes, there are. Why are you asking?”

“Oh, I’m only curious.” he said playfully, a mischievous spark lighting in his eyes and you frowned again, but Gandalf gave you no further explanation.

“I must go.” You said, bowing your head slightly to Gandalf and the elf-lord, and they returned the farewell, before the guard led you out of the balcony and through the corridors again, until you reached the front gate.

Your beast was waiting where you left it, ready to fly as soon as you climbed it. You looked at Rivendell one last time before you gave the creature a mark to fly, and in the next second, you were heading Sauron’s fortress, hoping that he was still asleep.

__________________

Taking two steps at a time, you run up the stairs, hurrying to reach Sauron’s bedroom. You lost your cape somewhere, but you ignored it, your mind fixed only on coming back before he would find out that you were gone.

You run to the door and opened it quietly, sneaking into the room. The evening already came and the room was dark, but Sauron was lying in the bed just as you left him, his chest raising and falling in steady rhythm.

You took off your dress and carefully slid under the sheets next to him, running your fingers gently through his hair and this time his eyes flicked open. He looked sleepily at you and his lips spread in a loving smile.

“Good morning, Y/N” he murmured and you giggled, placing a kiss on his forehead.

“More like good evening, Sauron.”

“An evening? I slept for so long?” his brows raised with surprise but he looked over your shoulder and saw a darkness falling over the land, and you chuckled again, shifting closer to him and into his open arms.

“And what did you do without me, then?” he asked, brushing your hair and kissing the top of your head.

“Reading, as per usual. But now, my dear husband, I need your attention.” You smirked, leaning to kiss his lips and he eagerly responded to your caress. And just as you wanted, Sauron gave you the exact attention you needed, as many time as you wished, leaving you spent and absolutely satisfied.

And, as you laid in his arms, slowly falling asleep, you noticed a moth landing on your desk, but before you could even think of why the wizard asked about them, your mind gave in into slumber.

You only hoped that Sauron was unaware of whare you had been.


	8. Revelation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader continues to scheme behind Sauron's back and the time comes to reveal it. 
> 
>  
> 
> Based on an imagine (Imagine being forced into a marriage with Sauron) from imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com.

Three days had passed since your visit to Rivendell before you were shown why moths were so essential.

Gandalf used them to communicate with you. At first, you were startled when the insect flew in your direction, aiming to land on your shoulder. You waved your hand, trying to scare it away, but the stubborn moth somehow managed to sit on your skin, its wings moving all the time and only then you realized they were forming sounds. And, one by one, you understood a word and then a sentence, which was an information of which direction the Fellowship was going to travel.

You, on the other hand, sent a name of the White Wizard, who was inhabiting Isengard, where he fulfilled Sauron’s orders, creating an army of warriors for a war your husband were planning. You didn’t forget to mention that in your first message to Gandalf.

Luckily for you, Sauron was not suspecting anything. He grew to trust you, considering you as his advisor and, oftentimes, you shared your thoughts with him, trying your best to sneak a suggestion of withdrawing the Ringwraiths from their chase after the Halfling or focusing Sauron’s attention on overseeing a process of making weapons and armor for his growing army.

It was very easy, truth be told, particularly after your rather exhausting, however satisfying love making. He was enchanted by you, and you felt guilty about using that influence against him, but you saw no other way considering a disastrous end if you did nothing but sit and wait.

It wasn’t you, you couldn’t let your husband be driven to death by his desire to retrieve the Ring. You knew it was clouding his mind, you saw it in his eyes even when he looked at you. But, as saddening as it was, it was also an advantage, for Sauron never believed you would be able to plan something against him.

How wrong he was to think that you would see him destroying himself and do nothing to stop it.

_____________

“Uruk-hai are marching, you have no more than three days” you whispered to a grey moth and it readily set off after receiving your message. It wasn’t Gandalf anymore, who would hear that news, the kind wizard who agreed to help you, had fallen in Moria. Your heart was heavy with sadness but you knew that the Fellowship needed your information.

So you kept sending them, now to the Strider and he kept sending back what they knew, and from that you learnt that they were closer and closer to Mordor every day. In your entire life, you had never put so much faith in anything. You hoped that that little hobbit would manage to throw the Ring into Mount Doom and end this madness once and forever.

You came to your bed and collapsed on it, quickly disrobing yourself. You felt tired, keeping your scheming hidden from your husband was consuming most of your energy, and it was only getting harder and harder every passing day.

Before his death, Gandalf managed to deliver you a word from Valar. It was a simple “yes”, but it filled you with joy and fear at the same time. You were happy that Sauron would be saved, but you were paralyzed by the prospect of what might happen to him when he would be taken to Valinor.

Because you were sure that it was the place the Valar intended to bring him. And you feared that there was a worse fate than death awaiting him there, even if you would try as you might to prevent it.

Who were you compared to mighty Valar?

_______

Day by day, for almost 3 years, you worked behind Sauron’s back, informing the Fellowship, and then both Frodo and the Strider about Sauron’s every move. Much to your joy, Gandalf turned out to be alive and well, and you were glad to call him The White. You let yourself believe that there might be a happy ending for all of you, even for your evil husband.

If you could, you would send a beast for Frodo to fly him right to Mount Doom, but your husband were spending all days and nights on scanning the Middle Earth. Seeing his enemies growing stronger and stronger made him only angrier, which led to furious screams, murdering his servants and accusing Saruman of spying. You waited for a moment he would accuse you, but he did not and that caused guilt to place permanently in your guts. Sauron, despite being lost in his thirst for the Ring, still loved you and it pained you to be very one who was spying.

Yet you knew that it was the only way to protect the one you loved.

_______________

“Y/N! Saruman failed! My whole army failed!” Sauron cried angrily as he looked at the Black Gates from the top of his fortress. You were standing next to him, but you weren’t looking at the battle. Gandalf informed you that Frodo would climb Mount Doom as they would fight and it was where you were now staring.

You weren’t able to see him, yet you felt that he was nearing his destination point. Sauron was focused on the battle but he was gazing every now and them over his shoulder at the mountain, spotting nothing as well.

You reached for his hand and squeezed it as you noticed few figures high on the sky, growing bigger and bigger every second. You recognized them immediately. The eagles. You were aware they would come, the Valar themselves sent you this message, using pure white moth.

You turned your eyes to look at your husband. His face was twisting with fury, his auburn eyes set ablaze with fire as he witnessed his failure, barely noticing your touch.

The eagles were almost there, you could see their riders – two tall elf-guards, one of them carrying heavy-looking handcuffs and you knew you had no more time.

“Sauron, remember that I love you.” you said with a shaking, full of agony voice, and he moved his eyes to look at you, confusion and shock evident in his gaze as he search your face before he saw the eagles behind your back.

“You…” he panted, pure despair filling his features as he jerked his hand from your grasp and took a step back, looking into your eyes with disbelief.

Meanwhile, the eagles landed, the elves jumping onto the floor, standing at each of your sides. One of them began approaching Sauron with handcuffs ready to be put on your husbands’ hands.

“How could you?!” he called, his tone accusing, his eyes burning with heartbreak and you felt your throat clenching as tears filled your eyes. “How could you..?” he repeated in a whisper, stepping back, but soon he had nowhere to move away from the elf, who was fast to close the shackles around your husbands’ wrists.

You could not say a word. You tried but you were unable to form any coherent sound. You could only look at your husband being led by the guard on the eagle with an apology in your eyes and tears streaming down your cheeks.

“My lady,” the elf by your side whispered and you glanced at him. “We must go.” He announced softly, offering you a hand to help you sit on the eagle and you heard the one, which your husband was sat on setting off. In no time you and the elf followed it, quickly flying next to it.

You were too afraid to ask what would happen next. You were too hurt by what you had done to even look at Sauron, but you had to.

He hung his head low, staring at his shackles and undeniably recognizing the work of his previous master. His silver hair were covering his face, but as it moved with the wind you noticed something, even despite your vision being blurred by the tears. And that view hurt you more than your scheming, than your unfair fate, than your loss and misery. It was far more moving than the prospect of what waited for you and him in Valinor, good or bad. It was a proof of a broken heart, a reflection of your own.

In the cold light of the moon you saw a tear running down Sauron’s cheek. 


	9. Trial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sauron and reader are brought to Valinor, where a trial takes place and where reader shows how bold she really is.
> 
>  
> 
> Based on an imagine (Imagine being forced into a marriage with Sauron) from imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com

Anxiously, with arms folded over your chest, you were pacing a small room, where you were lead by the guard after the eagles landed on a soft, vividly green grass before a tall, white palace. Sauron was immediately taken inside, you weren’t even granted a look or a word in his direction. 

Now, as you were waiting for something, anything to happen, doubts started to creep into your mind. What if the Valar would not show mercy? What if your husband would be punished before you were able to defend him? 

What if you would not look at him again?

Shaking your head, you tried to throw dark thoughts away, but the longer you were locked in that room, the darker they became, filling your every cell with dread. The guard was silent, he wasn’t even looking at you. he didn’t answer your questions, too, so you were left with nothing, wishing to be taken away from there.

Anywhere would be better than that room, anything would be better than not knowing. 

Another hour passed before the door finally cracked open and another guard entered, asking you to come with him. You almost started to run, relieved that you were be faced with something else than silence and only your thoughts.

As you excited the room, the guard led you out of the corner and into a wide long corridor, on an end of which a tall intricately carved white door awaited and, as soon as you neared it, it was swung open by two elves. 

You had never seen a room so spacious and so bright as the one you had just walked in. It seemed to have no ceiling when you raised your eyes as high as you could, but when a rich gentle voice called your name you turned your gaze to its direction.

In the middle, formed in a half-circle there were eight chairs made of silver, with white cushions. On the two highest ones, in the middle of the line, you saw Manwë, with long white locks, dressed in a silver robe and white trousers. He had grey eyes and was looking at you warmly. On his right Varda, with golden hair, sparkling blue eyes and long white dress, kept his eyes fixed on the Vala on Manwë’s left – Aulë, a broad, muscled Valar, with brown long hair and beard, dressed in black smith clothes. 

Next to Aulë sat his wife, Yavanna, a beautiful lady with light brown skin, gentle black eyes and curly brown hair, all in green and gold. Among the others you saw Nienna, in rich grey dress and a veil, Ulmo, in a blue robe and black trousers, Oromë, in red and brown and Mandos, dressed in black. 

Suddenly you felt so small, standing in front of the mighty Valar. 

You dared look at Sauron. His head was still hung, he gave no sign of acknowledging your presence. You, however, were too frightened to make a move towards him, so you took a deep breath and focused your eyes on Manwë.

“My lady Y/N, do not fear, no harm will come from us,” he assured you and you nodded, unable to form a smile or any coherent answer. “We are deeply grateful for your help in the latest events and we wish to reward you. Ask for anything you desire.” 

“Spare my husband’s life,” you replied immediately and you heard all of them gasp. You glanced at Sauron next to you and you noticed his eyes were on you now, staring at you with disbelief and surprise. 

“Spare him?” Aulë snapped, growling lowly. “He deserves nothing but death, for corrupting my smiths, dishonoring my authority and running away to serve Morgoth. How can you ask us to let him live after all he had done to this land? He had brought a shadow upon this world, did you not see it?!” 

“What I saw, lord Aulë, was my father forcing me to marry a monster. And then, I saw nothing more but misery and injustice. I’ve witnessed my father’s madness, I’ve witnessed by homeland’s fall, I’ve witnessed creation of creatures that should not be ever bread. And I had only one person, one who was said to be a monster yet showed me respect and love, to see me through this. How can you expect me not to fight for the life of that person? How am I possibly stand still while you wish to bring him death? If you are to kill him, kill me as well, for I do not want to carry on without my husband.”

Your bold speech, your voice shaking from anger and despair made all of the Valar speechless, looking at you with wide open eyes. None of them anticipated it, none of them thought of you as courageous enough to propose such thing. Only Yavanna looked at you with admiration, the rest was rather confused. 

As you waited, once more, switching your gaze from one Valar to another, trying to guess their answers, Sauron’s fingers brushed your hand shyly and you cocked your head to the side to look at him. Hope filled his auburn eyes as you intertwined your fingers with his, squeezing his palm reassuringly. 

“Do you fully realize what Mairon is accused of?” Manwë asked after a longer while and you nodded in confirmation. 

“And you are aware of the weight of your request?” Yavanna implored gently and you nodded again. “You are sure that is what you desire?” 

“Yes, I am,” you replied, stepping closer to your husband, finding comfort in his closeness as Manwë studied you and Sauron with knitted brows. 

“We must punish him, Manwë,” Aulë stated harshly, “he cannot be saved.”

“There must be a way…” a weak, trembling voice belonging to Nienna came, Yavanna joined to her plea and Manwë took a deep breath before his booming voice dominated every other sound, including the beating of your heart.

You held your breath as he announced your sentence, clinging on Sauron’s shoulder as your fate was presented to you.


	10. Acceptance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final part of the series - Sauron and reader are granted a happy ending, and reader receives an unexpected news. 
> 
> Based on imagine (Imagine being forced into a marriage with Sauron) from imaginexhobbit.tumblr.com

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a smut part in this chapter and a bit of Sauron's POV.

With your head still spinning a little, you walk cautiously through the grass field, heading to your small house at the edge of the forest. You have been given a free afternoon from your work by lady Yavanna’s side – you are her personal assistant, helping her with caring for Valinor’s beautiful gardens.

Today, however, from the morning you have been feeling a little sick. Your stomach felt nauseous, you could barely eat anything and you were feeling constantly dizzy. Lady Yavanna noticed it quickly and took you to a healer, who then called a midwife to confirm his thoughts about your state.

And then you were told that you are expecting a child.

You are still unable to believe in it. You are carrying a baby. And while it fills you with unspeakable happiness, you still need to pass the news to your husband.

You know he is not home yet. He is given a long shifts in the forges, the longest of all smiths, but he never complains about it. Lord Aulë has his own way to punish your husband after lord Manwë presented Sauron’s sentence, which in lord Aulë’s opinion was highly unfair.

Lord Manwë, after your rather moving speech, decided to spare Sauron’s life, after all. His powers, however, were taken from him and were to never be given back, under any circumstances. You were more than happy upon hearing it, why wouldn’t you be since you were granted with your husband and given a chance to live happily?

Sauron returned to name Mairon, and was working as lord Aulë’s apprentice, which only meant that Mairon was supervised and kept an eye on all the time he spent in the forges.

But it all do not bother him nor you as you are finally able to live as you have ever wanted to; together for all eternity.

Your immortality was blessed by white magic of lady Yavanna, and you presume it was her magic that allowed you to conceive a baby, since even after centuries of being with Sauron you were unable to get pregnant.

As you entered your house, you instantly head to the kitchen. Being aware of your state was somehow soothing and only now you feel how hungry you have been. You fetch yourself a plate of sweet fruit and with a delighted smile you sit at the small table in living room to snack on your dish while waiting for your husband to return home.

You cannot wait to tell him. You are sure he will be overjoyed. None of you mentioned having children yet, but you feel that Mairon secretly wanted them. He truly wished to start a new life, a better life with you by his side.

Absentmindedly, your hand wanders to your stomach. Only now you notice that it is, in fact, a little rounded, but not so much for it to be visible yet. A strange yet pleasant warmth fills you as you think about the babe growing in your womb, squeezing a few happy tears from your eyes. You wipe them before they can even roll down your cheeks.

Minutes pass by and you manage to finish your meal, prepare yourself a cup of your favourite tea and start reading a book before the front door creaks open and Mairon quietly sneaks into the room. Immediately, you rise from your seat and run to him, throwing yourself into his opened arms.

“Oh, I’ve missed you so much today, my Y/N,” he whispers into your ear and you smile widely at him, brushing your lips ever so gently against his. You run your fingers through his silver hair, playing with strands of his locks, before you fix your gleaming eyes on his.

“I have something to tell you,” you begin, grinning wider and wider as you watch Mairon’s brow knitting over his nose.

“Something happened? Something bad?”

“No, my love,” you giggle, seeing his concern. You lead him to the sofa, motioning for him to sit. After he does so, you slide yourself onto his lap, your legs across his. He places one of his hand on the small of your back, supporting you, and the other on your knee.

“But I think there are changes awaiting us. A lot of them, I suppose. We must prepare a room, for sure, and we will need a whole new set of furniture. Oh and new garments! So many clothes, although I still do not know of what size and color. And I will need new gowns, too! I have not thought of it before, how did I forget about my clothing? Well, I have learnt only few hours before, I suppose it is not enough time to think about every single aspect of what is before us,” you quirk your brow slightly, stopping your merry rambling for a moment.

“I do not understand,” Mairon murmurs, confusion twisting his features, “why would you need new garments? And new furniture?”

“Because, my dear husband,” you take one of his hands, the one on your knee and move it to your stomach, “we are having a baby,” your voice is shaking with tears of joy, but a smile spreads on your lips as you watch your husband.

Mairon’s eyes land, first, on his hand on your belly – he parts his fingers and examines its roundness gingerly, before he rises his gaze at you. His eyes are filled with tears, as well, and his mouth falls agape, a trembling breath escapes pass them as he looks at you with mix of shock and happiness.

“You-you’re pregnant?” he pants in a tone not louder than a whisper and you only manage to nod, not believing your voice to form any words.

Mairon is fast to scoop you in his arms, holding you tightly against his chest, which is raising and falling rapidly as a laughter mingles with sobs – you feel his tears falling into your hair as he rests his head atop yours, kissing you every now and them. You, too, are unable to hold back your tears and it takes the two of you quite a while before you can speak again.

Mairon cradles your face tenderly, stroking your wet cheeks as he gazes into your eyes with unhidden joy. You place your palms on his large ones, caressing his hands.

“I do not know what I’ve done to deserve this, but I swear that I will do anything to make you as happy as you make me, even more. I love you, Y/N,” he whispered passionately and you flash a loving smile at him, resting your forehead against his.

Silence falls, but you do not need words to share your emotions. The gazes you and Mairon exchange are enough to speak about your love, a newly awoken anticipation for the babe that grows in your belly, a promise of care and a lifetime of joy and mutual respect.

As the night begins to fall, as if reading your mind, Mairon lifts you gently and carries you bridal-style to your bedroom. He strips you slowly and so do you as a need to show your love to one another overwhelms both of you.

He is tender when he lays you on the bed and carefully takes care of your every need, showering your skin with hot kisses, not letting an inch of your body to be left uncovered. He doesn’t rush anywhere, lost in the melody of sweet sounds you are making from his every touch; his hunger for you grows with every writhe of your body, every clench of your fingers on his shoulders, and when he finally eases inside you, both of you forget how to breathe for a brief moment.

“I love you,” you moan as he begins to move – his pace is slow, but it is enough to set your whole body aflame. His lips are instantly on yours, stealing your breath away once more and you lace your ankles together around his hips, allowing him to bury himself deeper within you.

Mairon gladly obliges, quickening his pace a little, making you chant his name over and over again as pure bliss washes through you, making you tremble underneath him. He follows you soon after, slowing and eventually halting as his release hits him. He locks his lips with yours, pecking them with soft kisses as the two of you relax and, after a while of whispering words of love and sweet nothings, your back is pressed against your husband’s chest, his arm wrapped protectively over your stomach.

With a joyous smile you fall asleep, assured that there is nothing but happiness awaiting you and Mairon.

_____

Mairon’s POV

I watch her as she falls asleep, her smooth back against my chest, out breaths synchronized. She lays her head on my outstretched arm, reaching her hand to entwine her fingers with mine. She has developed a habit of doing it before she gives up to slumber.

My lips curl with a soft smile as I simply look at Y/N. To be honest, I have never seen her more beautiful than in times when she rests in my embrace. She is so peaceful then, so serene it amazes me.

I have never thought that my life will turn this way. I was positive it would end there, before the Valar, but then Y/N came in and saved me. And, gods, I surely did not deserve it, not for what I had done.

Yet, she had somehow seen the good in me, and decided that I was worth fighting for. She brought me to the light, she redeemed me and I will never be able to show her fully how grateful I am for being blessed with her.

There are lots of people who still despise me, but I cannot care less. All my being, every cell in my body is set to bring Y/N the joy she deserves; to express my love for her. I may be put thought the hardest of work yet it does not fret me – I will endure that only to see Y/N’s smile upon my arrival home.

And now the child… I have never imagined I will be gifted with so much happiness. Y/N alone is my miracle and the fact that there is a new life growing inside her makes my heart swallow with love and glee.

I gingerly caress her stomach, not wanting to wake her up. She twitches slightly, adjusting her position and I place a kiss on her shoulder. From the day I met her, from the day she was wed to me I have feared that she would change me.

And she has changed me. But I’m no longer afraid.

Now, I accept it.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! :)


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